A bit of Dis-Array so says the 10 of Cups

This blog, Insightful Oracle is a personal journey. There was a point in my life, just a few years ago where I could walk outside, take in a deep breath and feel complete contentment. Everything was the way it was supposed to be. Not perfect, not complicated - just the way it was meant to be. Following that particular feeling it seemed as though the Law of Attraction no longer held merit in my life. While I tried to keep myself grounded, compassionate, and at bay of negativity; it still infested my life. While I continued to hold steady and dredge the storm - inside I had moments where I just wanted to throw in the towel and say "Ok, you win." But, I haven't because I am stubborn and not willing to pass up an experience I am supposed learn from.

 While details are not of vast importance to soothe curiosity -  alcoholism has been the black plague I've battled for a little over ten-years. No friend - not me ... my addiction is coffee! My spouse. It has ripped apart every connection my family has. It has destroyed everything in it's path. It has, in my own observation been similar to a tornado in the midst of it's rage, destroying everything within it's path without mercy or regret.

Today I drew a card - a daily card. A method of study and reflection for myself. I didn't "think" I was allowing my brain to spin around in circles at the time of drawing. I'm convinced I was wrong. The cards felt my energies and that was enough to draw out what needed to be seen and reflected upon. I later subdued my curiosity with a reading and a single question ... "Where am I in my life right now, in this present moment?"

I used Doreen Virtue's Angel cards and it was confirmed ... the angels are singing: Reflect deeply, this situation you have tried to make work is not working. You can try again if you want to, but, understand - there is someone involved who lacks integrity and is oblivious to those surrounding him (my interpretation).

Thank you for the confirmation. *sigh* As we all know, the tarot doesn't always show us what we WANT to see - but, what we NEED to see to make the best choices possible. Or at least that's what I believe.

Life story set aside - I still completed my self assigned task of daily card reflection. The ten of Cups ...

Ten of Cups

Suit of Cups if the second suit in the minor Arcana.
Element: Water
The Ten of Cups is known as the "home and family" card.
Selected upright this card represents positive things, good things, and happiness.
Selected in reverse it could indicate a broken home, loss/grief, and/or disruption.

My interpretation of today's card and my surrounding circumstances -

The ten of cups is telling me to be strong, even if my values and beliefs are challenged. Stand up for what I believe in, fairly. It's presence is suggesting that someone I have a relationship with is disrupting the usual harmony and that the current situation is causing stress. The ten of cups confirms that my feelings of being "let down" is justified considering all aspects.

Perhaps today's study was a bit bias considering I was a bit taken aback at how this card was drawn considering my current situation and pending changes. Ironic? Truth be told - I'm glad it made it's presence today as it only helped me look deeper, reflect longer, and make sense of a few things I just couldn't wrap around my head for the longest time.

Thanks for reading.

With Love,

Mandy